Internal Family Systems for Couples

Internal Family Systems* (IFS) is a powerful tool in couple’s counseling. When a couple’s protectors and/or firefighters are in conflict, the result can be chaotic. When we work with the parts from a place of compassion and curiosity, such understanding and healing can result.

You might complain -

  • My partner is unreasonable

  • She’s always angry

  • He’s defensive

  • Every conversation ends in a fight

*IFS was developed by Richard Schwarz in the 1980s. It is a powerful approach to counseling which assists the client to heal, and to better know their own heart. As an individual heals this inevitably impacts relationships. But as a couple works on parts together, compassion is birthed and relationships deepen.

Parts work is such a gift for couples.

  • It brings understanding

  • It builds compassion

As each partner comes to know the child within the other, the exile who needs unburdening, compassion is birthed. New paths of relationship are forged.

I’ve worked with couples for decades. I am an IFS trained (not certified) pastoral counselor. I understand conflict and how to help couples remap the patterns in their relationship. I work both in-person and with telehealth appointments.